“Dear G Spot,

Umm...I have been having sex with two of my best friends for a few months now. I’ve noticed that both seem to be getting clingy and having dramatic moments when it comes to "sleeping over" on the weekends. I have no desire to go out with either of them but at the same time I am enjoying the comfort of having good sex without the relationship. Am I on the track to destruction or is there a solution to my friendcest dilemma?


SS Randy Blue

Sleeping with the best, friends with privileges, friendcest, it can have many names but can do a number on your friendship. It can be worse than lending family money or inviting your bus along on your summer vacation. The perks can be fabulous and bountiful but at the same time there is always that feeling of uneasiness.
Your friends seem to have no problem with having no-strings-attached sex and judging by how long you’ve been doing this there doesn’t appear to be any problems in the near future either. Many times people and friends desire to have the company of another person but they also do not want to feel the commitment, pressure, or limitations of a relationship. In fact, over the past twenty years friendcest has become increasingly popular that now many people have a friend with privileges set in their speed dial.
How is this a bad thing, you ask? Well, there are many downsides to friendcest. Often times one partner will become obsessed and territorial with the mutual partner causing the situation to become very awkward, this usually leaves the obsessee short one friend when everything is said and done.
My advice would be to go for it. Just make sure that everyone knows that it’s only about the sex and that all privileges will be lost as soon as someone starts to become clingy or awkward. If done right, then you should not have to worry about it destroying your friendship and if feelings between both parties become strong enough you have the building blocks of trust, friendship and understanding already in place for a serious relationship. Just remember to keep it mutual and to play safe, the sex shouldn’t be the only thing kept under wraps.

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